Monday, September 3, 2007

Yes, I’m back in Alaska

Problem with Anchorage is I know too many ppl and places plus kids, parents and the ex-wife. It is way to easy to fall back into the same old grind. Well I have a lot of thoughts, and it has been along time since I have posted so here goes. Let me first; apologize for the random stream of consciousness but it all qualifies as Life.

Little Bro's ashes, I really don't want to put him in some fancy urn on my mantle. I don't even have a fire place. So, here's the plan …scatter him in three places. One is downtown Anchorage across from the old hospital, by the Park Strip, at the house we lived in when he was born. Second is at the mouth of the Kasilof River where we used to dip net red salmon. Third is at Beach lake in Birchwood where he used to party. I was thinking of making some Uncle Bubba geocache sites also but, Alaska has so many geocaches it isn't that unique. Maybe I will start an Uncle Bubba travel bug.

Mom and Dad, arrrgh Well I have sent about ½ of my three weeks home at mom and dad's house down in Soldotna. Dad is totally gone. Retirement and the complete lack of any activity as allowed the PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) to take over. Pops is a Korea and 2x Vietnam combat vet. He is constantly paranoid and paces around the house. He is not eating and I had to tell mom to call the doctor and take him to the hospital because he has lost so much weight, he was in for a week to get his weight and fluids up. Mom is in complete denial on how bad the situation is….mom historically isn't as incompetent as she seems in this situation but perhaps Bubba and Aunt Rose dying within 3 month of each other has had an effect? Last Sunday the boyz drove down for dinner and after dinner Dad announced that the food was poisoned….he is paranoid on the verge of psychotic. We had to explain the food was good, we all cooked it and it was safe to eat. Talking to my sister later it became clear that he is just scared shitless of everything. I guess it, the PTSD, has always been in the background but retirement left nothing to screen the weird behavior like working did. Sigh… we all saw it, there were lots of signs, but we didn't recognize the gravity until it was too late. Long story short, I told mom he needs to go to a psychiatric institute or hospital he is too much for her to take care of at home.

Yow, I remember going thru the times when everyone was getting married then having kids. This new phase of growing old and dying isn't too exciting. Speaking of kids I learned a valuable lesson. DON'T LET UR 21YO SON LIVE IN UR HOUSE WHILE YOU'RE GONE. Duh…apparently there was a party or two. Being the resourceful father I am, I hit the kid's roommate's blog to get any 411 on the said affair(s). Read http://wanghunglo.livejournal.com the Jan 4th entry. Young dude Wanghunglo owes me a mirror. I have also deduced that the broken tap explains the dark stains on the walls and ceiling of the bathroom. At least it appears to have been a decent dark/amber keg. Good thing is both boyz are enrolled in college, and currently have jobs. Primo is planning Segondo's 20th BD party. I have obtained written affidavits that the party will not be at the house.

Hmmm lots of details above but few thoughts, I'll summarize. I am torn about being back in Anchorage, some good feelings and lot of bad feeling. It is like I never left same old crap to deal with. I need to be gone before it snows, winter here will be depressing. I really miss my brother Bubba. http://www.myspace.com/welovebubba I don't want to be responsible for my parents, hell I'm not done with raising my own kids yet. However, I'm close to being done with kids, and the boyz are turning out pretty kewl so far.

Yup, nothing was said about relationships and future work. You could say I saved the hard topics for later. Next post will be free entrepreneurial ideas for young adventuresome capitalist eager to earn millions.